More Than Meets The Eye Vol. 2 : A Collection Of Illuminating & Important Essays By 11th Graders at John O’ Connell High
Social People by Kelly Guerrero
Every day you meet some person out there in the streets of San Francisco, a beautiful place that’s full of people. Perhaps you have never seen them. No wonder so many of us know a lot of people. The point is that meeting people is a warm feeling you get since you never know if you’ll meet your future husband or boyfriend and maybe even the person who can tell everything to, your new best friend. It’s wonderful meeting people, who are total strangers at first, but after a while they’ll mean so much to you and you would do anything for them. You don’t know them, and it would be an honor to meet them and make an impact in their life even if I’m just there for a little bit. I’m a social kind of person since I love talking and making friends and just getting to know someone. But just because I’m social doesn’t mean I’m a gossiper. Gossipers- ugh! I don’t like them, especially when I see someone at school blabbering their mouth in a the hallway by class talking about me. It really gets me frustrated and it makes me want to tell them t go to class. Don’t they have anything better to do? I don’t like it when people gossip about me because it’s not their business in the first place, and it’s totally disrespectful of them, especially when someone spreads a rumor that isn’t true. It gets me angry and that’s why I’m not a gossiper.
Social people are very different from gossipers because social people don’t judge as much as gossipers do. The difference between being a gossiper and just a plain social person is that gossipers will talk about you because they’re jealous of you or for some reason they just don’t like you. Being social is being the kind of person that talks to people; the kind that likes meeting people, making friends, and starting conversations. However, many people confuse gossipers with social people because they think that just because people talk about others, they have nothing better to do, or don’t have a life, but social person may just make a simple comment about you that would make your day. For example, I would just say, “Oh, how cute is your shirt”-a simple compliment. Unlike gossipers, social people actually make you feel good about yourself; you can trust them and talk to them about your problems if you need help or advice.
A lot of research has been done about gossip and teenage girls. In the article, “Girls Just Want to Be Mean,” Margaret Talbot talks about how girls are aggressive towards other girls. One of the common ways that girls tend to hurt each other and take revenge is through gossip mongering. Finnish professor Kaj Bjorkqvist says, “Girls can better understand how other girls feel, so they know better how to harm them.” Girls know how it feels when someone backstabs them so they tend to do the same to other girls to hurt them. Many girls are always talking about other people, judging them and being rude, not realizing that they’re becoming gossipers, and that’s when the fun starts- a fight starts just because of dumb and ignorant things girls say to each other just to get at them.
Another one of the most important steps to make after you talk to a friend is to gain trust from them. When you trust someone it’s because you know they won’t tell your personal things to other people. Some people would actually spread rumors about you to mess with you. One day I found out that one of my closest friends told somebody else a secret of mine at school during lunch outside, on the wet green soccer field. The way I felt when my friend told someone my secret made me feel upset, disappointed, mad, embarrassed…all those feelings that made me just want to go up to them and scream to them that I wish I had never met them in the first place. I thought I could actually trust someone, but never be so confident about letting someone know something that’s personal. That’s why you shouldn’t be a gossiper.
Sometime the best thing to do is to walk away from someone who once was a close friend. For example, one day during class my close friend was sitting behind me and I heard she was saying nasty stuff about someone. Then I heard my name and I just stayed in shock, not knowing what to say or what to do. After the class was over I went to her and I told her we had to talk about something new, so she said, “Yeah…OK?” And at that moment, a tear almost fell from my eye, but I had to hold it in and tell her. What I told her was very harsh and she left crying and she told me she was really sorry, but I just couldn’t bear not saying something back to her. Since then we are no longer friends and I will always remember what she did to me. Eventually you find out who people really are; most are gossipers, which is sad to say, but the truth will always find its way to you. Many of us never see it coming, the lies and lie behind someone’s mouth that can destroy you in seconds. You may not realize your friend can easily become your enemy. Gossipers are cruel.
Last time I remember I was with a group of friends and there was an new student in class. My friend Mia said, “Hey, guys, let’s go meet this chick, she’s new.” After that, my friends Mia and Sabrina spoke to her and told us that she seemed nice but there was something about her that was odd. Later on that day my friends and I were hanging out with her at lunch and she spoke to everyone. She had to make new friends and get to know people so she wouldn’t be a loner. We all got to know her better, and two months later she had gotten to know many people. Suddenly, the new girl had spread a rumor about my friend Isabella since they were a little closer than all of us in the group. Later on that day we all got together during lunch and were talking about the new chick, like how we thought she was, and if the rumor she spread about Isabella was true, but we didn’t know so we went with Isabella to go see what would happen. Isabella and the new chick were talking and we heard that the rumor was true and we were shocked and told her not to bother coming to us ever again. What she had done was totally horrible, I guess you should watch closely how someone is when you first meet him or her. You never known, though; as a social person you just want to make friends and meet new people, but walk away from gossipers. There is no need for drama. By meeting new people you just never know who or what you’ll find out about someone. They’re like a box of surprises to you, yet as a social person I just want to meet people all the time.
Through all of my friendships I have learned something new about those people and I have gotten an idea of who are my so-called “friends.” The main thing is that throughout all the friends I’ve had, I’ve gained perspective on how people can be. People should just min their own business and give others their space. When I meet someone I let him or her be themselves, since I’m trying to go to know them. That’s why I’m a social person and love to meet people.